Bottom Five Houston Sports Moments in 2013

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Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports


I’m a huge fan of Louie CK and his show on FX. There is an episode called “Halloween/Ellie”. During the episode Louie starts pitching a movie idea to some Executive at Paramount. In his own words:

I always wanted to make a movie where a guy’s life is really bad, and then something happens and it makes it worse. But instead of resolving it, he just makes bad choices, and then it goes from worse to really bad. And things keep happening to him, and he keeps doing dumb things, so his life just gets worse and worse, and darker. He lives in a one-room apartment, he’s not a very good-looking guy, has no real friends, and he works in a factory where they…like a sewage disposal plant. And then he gets fired, so now he doesn’t even have his job at the [expletive] factory anymore, and he’s going broke and takes a trip and it rains. But then he meets a girl and she’s beautiful and he falls in love, so you think that’s going to be the thing, the happy thing, but then she turns out to be a crook and she robs him. She takes his wallet, and he’s stuck in the middle of nowhere and he’s got no wallet, no credit card. Like, what do you do? How do you even get home?”

Louie was describing some poor schmuck, that just couldn’t get it right. That schmuck might as well have been Houston Sports in 2013.

Yesterday our Editor Yoni Pollak wrote about the 2013 Top 5 Moments in Houston Sports. I was kind of shocked that he was able to find five. Maybe, I’m just jaded from all the bad.

Yoni asked me if I wanted to do the 2013 Bottom 5 Moments in Houston Sports and I jumped at the opportunity.

But, let’s go ahead and call this the 2013 Rock-Bottom 5 Moments in Houston Sports. Because this is the lowest of the low. Our girlfriends have just robbed us and left us stranded in Dallas. We have no money, no car, no phone. Nothing. How are we going to get home?


If you would add a different event or change the order of the bottom five moments, please let us know in the comments section below.

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Without further ado…


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